I recently googled shopping addiction, and it showed “About 168,000,000 results (0.60 seconds).”
I was pretty shocked how many people feel bound or caught up in the trappings of the instant gratification of spending and purchasing goods.
But maybe I shouldn’t?
When I think about how we now live in a world full of instant gratification.
It is easy to pick up the mobile phone next to you and jump on to that all-important shopping app. Before you know where you are, £££ spent on stuff and more stuff. And, of course, it is so easy to put in those debit/credit card details. Not like in the old days of hard cash. If you didn’t have it, you couldn’t spend it.
How has your spending changed during and since Lockdown?
I know that I go to the shops less, and I have that famous go-to app that delivers to my door the next day. But, also see that not everything is available on the high street, maybe because it creates lower overheads for businesses?
We are often looking outside of ourselves to make ourselves feel better in the moment.
As a child, maybe, when you were feeling sad, your parents bought a little gift that gave you a feeling of being noticed and loved.
This could lead to the unconscious creating a story that gifts and presents will create that feeling of warmth and self-love. This is a mistake on the part of the ego. That feeling comes from inside you just as all the other feelings are created from within you. Be kind and recognise the thoughts that are being created in the mind when you feel good.
A thought is totally invisible and yet it is given a lot of attention. Unfortunately, you can not change a thought. Once it has arrived, notice and let it pass just like a cloud in the sky.
A lady worked with her husband in his business; as the company grew, he worked more and more, including going abroad. He was also able to hire staff and no longer required his wife to work. As she grew bored, she went to the shops and purchased many beautiful clothes that she never wore. She said the shop assistants swooned over her, and she felt important and needed. This is something that she hadn’t felt for quite some time. So she decided to auction many of the purchases and donate the money to a charity. She then worked to raise funds for the charity.
The lady found a new purpose that gave her the feeling of fulfilment and love.
So whats makes the difference between shopping/spending addiction and just the pleasure of purchasing something new.
Addiction comes from the Latin word Enslaved or bound. The term has evolved in the English language and is very broadly used. Generally, suppose something is taking up more thinking time than normal daily activities. For example, you may plan the day and evening around your spending time on shopping channels and apps, browsing the internet, or popping into shops. You will be hiding the purchases, pretending they don’t exist. You are taking out more credit cards to clear the ones you already have and telling yourself that you have it all under control.
Maybe you know someone like this?
Today I want to give you three things to think about when it comes to shopping. Whether man or woman, it makes no difference.
1 Do you NEED any of it?
Each year around February/March, I go through my wardrobe, through the loft, through the garden; I think you get the picture. Yes, I go through everything and look for what I no longer use. Years ago, I purchased ‘clear your clutter with Feng Shui. The author suggests that if you haven’t used it for six months, bin or give it away. [If something is sentimental, then different rules apply] When I started to practice this, our lives changed. We purchased our 1st family home in Milton Keynes.
Clutter in the home/office can cause poor mental health.
2. Before purchasing?
- Set a timer on your phone for 2 minutes and do a simple breathing exercise. For example, square breathing, count 4 in-breath, hold for the count of 2, then count 4 for the out-breath.
- I teach clients 7-11 breathing techniques or 5-9 as it is often easier. Watch the video for a demonstration. I also use TFT (Thought Field Therapy) or EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique)
3. Ask yourself.
- How long will I remain in a happy feeling after I purchase?
- Check wardrobes and cupboards to see all the purchases previously made and not used.
To summarise, if you are concerned about out of control spending or are in debt, there is help for you. So don’t suffer in silence.
If you would like to know how hypnotherapy could help book a free discovery call